So, you’re off to France. Très exciting! The land of flaky pastries, fabulous fashion and enough cheese to make your suitcase smell for weeks. But as enchanting as France is, it also has its quirks, some charming, others just plain confusing.
Whether it’s your first time or your fifth, here are 10 travel hacks to help you navigate France like a local (or at least not like a completely lost tourist). British humour included, but don’t worry, these tips translate well for everyone.
1. Always Say Bonjour (Seriously)
In France, greetings are everything. Walking into a shop, café or even a lift without saying “bonjour” is like walking into someone’s house and ignoring them. It’s not just rude, it’s sacrilege.
Hack: Make it your first word, even if it’s the only French you know. Add a smile and voilà, you’ve already made a better impression than half the tourists.
2. Coffee Comes with Rules (and Attitude)
You don’t just grab coffee in France. It’s a ritual. If you want it quick and cheap, stand at the bar. If you sit at a table, be prepared to pay more, because apparently, chairs are a luxury.
Hack: Ordering “un café” gets you an espresso. If you want something closer to a flat white, ask for a café crème or café au lait. And don’t expect iced coffee, ice is rarer than a polite Parisian pigeon.
3. The Metro: Magical but Slightly Mad
The Paris Metro is brilliant once you get the hang of it, but the signs can be vague and the stations confusing. Oh, and the doors don’t always open automatically. You might need to press a button, twist a handle, or give it a gentle shove (or all three at once).
Hack: Download Citymapper or the RATP app before you go. Trust me, it’ll save your sanity, and your soles.
4. Waiters Aren’t Rude, They’re Just… French
You might find the service in French cafés a bit brisk. It’s not personal, it’s just cultural. They’re not trying to ruin your day, they just assume you’d rather eat your food in peace than bond over the menu.
Hack: Greet your server, be polite and try to order in French (even badly). A little effort goes a long way. Smiles? Optional. Bread basket? Obligatory.
5. Picnic Like a Pro
The real French dining experience? A sunny patch of grass, a fresh baguette, gooey cheese, some fruit and a bottle of wine. Forget fancy restaurants, this is where the magic happens.
Hack: No corkscrew? Ask a local, use your shoe (look it up), or buy wine with a screw cap. You’re on holiday. Make it work.
6. See the Eiffel Tower… From a Distance
Climbing the Eiffel Tower sounds romantic until you’re two hours into a queue with 400 other tourists and a sunburn. The best view of the tower is not from on it.
Hack: Head to the rooftop of Galeries Lafayette or the Montparnasse Tower. You’ll get sweeping views and a photo of the Eiffel Tower actually in it.
7. Sundays Are Basically Sleep Mode
Many shops, supermarkets and even bakeries close on Sundays. The first time you realise this will probably be when you’re hungry and everything is shut.
Hack: Stock up on snacks and essentials on Saturday. Or use Sunday to do as the French do: slow down, take a stroll and eat too much bread.
8. Dress the Part, but Mind the Cobbles
The French dress effortlessly well. You’ll notice this the moment you arrive. That said, the streets, especially in older cities, are full of cobblestones that do not play nice with flimsy shoes.
Hack: Opt for comfy trainers or supportive flats that still look sharp. Think “stylish but sensible”, not “hiking boots at a wedding”.
9. Paris Is Lovely, But It’s Not All There Is
Don’t stop at Paris. France is packed with hidden gems, vineyards in Bordeaux, lavender fields in Provence, storybook towns in Alsace and more cheese regions than you knew existed.
Hack: Take the TGV (France’s speedy train system) and explore beyond the capital. You’ll get smaller crowds, better prices and scenery that looks like a painting.
10. Always Have Loose Change (for the Loo)
Some public toilets in France cost money to use, especially in train stations or busy areas. And no, they don’t take cards. If you’re caught unprepared, it’s… not ideal.
Hack: Keep some coins handy. You’ll thank yourself when you’re desperate and staring at a pay-to-pee machine with no mercy.
Final Thought:
France is full of flavour, both literally and culturally. It can be elegant and chaotic, charming and confusing, but that’s part of the fun. Embrace the slow lunches, the long walks, and the occasional language barrier. You don’t need to be fluent, you just need to be open, polite, and always ready for cheese.
Bon voyage, and remember: if all else fails, a confident “bonjour” and a well-timed shrug can get you through anything.
